Is Motherhood hard? Well, I wouldn't use that word...

So I am sure I will have a lot of moms up in arms about the title of this post.  I know that everyone loves to say being a mother is hard and I agree with the sentiment, but as I said above, I wouldn't use that word.  Why?  Because I am a person that believes in the power of words.


A yoga student went up to his teacher and asked him "Why do we have to chant "om" at the end of class?".  The teacher replied, "The sound we make when saying OM helps us reach a deeper peace within us.".  The student said, "Come on, just by saying the word I am supposed to become a more peaceful person? ".  The teacher said, "You are being an asshole".  The student got so angry he started yelling at his teacher.  The teacher calmly said, "Do you still mistrust that saying just one word can change you?"
(totally paraphrased from my meditation teacher from many years ago)


When you are teaching your child something difficult and they are on the verge of giving up, what do they say?  "I can't, it's TOO HARD!".  If you have to choose between two equally awful decisions you are trapped between a rock and a HARD place.  "Hard" is unyielding, unforgiving, unmalleable, and all it does is steal your power to be better in some way, even if it means changing how you think.  After all, if it is hard, you have excuses to fail, to be late, to be unprepared, to be less than you could be.

Of course I know that being a mother is challenging.  There are times that I want to crawl under a rock (when K, the oldest kid at a play date, is the worst sharer), retreat into a warm bath (when the house is a wreck and somehow does not have the ability to clean itself) or run away with my imaginary lover to tour some foreign land (when I am reading Eat, Pray, Love).  But I can't say it is hard.  I have to say difficult or problematic.  I use a word that I know I can work with, something I can shape or form, something I can solve, plan around, prepare for...  I cannot win against "hard" unless I smack up against it over and over, smashing it like a hammer against rock.  And is that how we want to be mothers, or people for that matter?

So I am challenged daily...  I am challenged to get out of the house on time with 2 (clean) children. I am working through the difficulty of providing healthy meals to a family of varied needs and tastes.  I am having issues with communicating with my husband so that we can work together as a well oiled machine.  I struggle through that extra mile on the treadmill, that one extra rep at Stroller Strides, no matter how exhausted.

I work with my challenges- I use my skills, my brain, my strength, my love, my heart and my patience to give it my best.  And at the end, I use my forgiveness.  Because I know that being a mother is hard a journey.  And who doesn't love that word...